One-liner of the day:
A girl phoned me the other day and said ... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.

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For the website of the day click here

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Where are we heading?

I had no plans of updating my blog for some time, as I said in my last post. But something in the papers today forced me to add a post. In case you are among the new high-bred generation for whom “newspaper” means just Delhi Times and the sports section, click here to get the article on TOI.

A husband tries to rape his wife, that too along a friend? Where has the human morality reached? More specifically, where has the human male’s morality reached? Have we stooped so low that we have forgotten fundamentals of human civility? This man tried to rape his wife with a friend of his in his car. And according to HT, he then pushed her off the moving car and called her parents and asked them to pick her up. Should not such people be hanged? Or taken to a public place and stoned to death? Before you vehemently nod you head in a frantic yes, I want to add one thing more.

Suppose the woman is lying? That is, what if nothing of that sort happened and she is falsely trying to implicate her husband?

Aghast? Astonished? Surprised? You never thought on that lines, did you? Now under no circumstances am I telling that something of this sort happened here, but however low I think of the male kind, I can’t think someone educated could do something like that And I’m not just talking about civility or moral values or something. How can someone do something that is so fuckingly foolish, in such a foolish manner something that is bound to put him behind bars for good. Not only he tries to rape his wife, that too in a car but he brings along a friend too. Then he throws her off the moving car and calls her parents and tells them to pick her up. How fucking foolish is that? Who will do that? No one in sane mind for sure. Something like that will guarantee you a place behind jails with 24 hours. Even an uneducated jhuggi-wala knows that. Under all probability the incident may be true, but I'm having serious doubts about it.

Which brings me to the point of the topic. As I said, the above case might be correct or false, that is a separate matter. What concerns me the most is how readily one believes such stories. Where you not filled with anguish and hatred against this man when you read the story? I was, for sure. Suppose the man was really innocent, how many of us are going to believe that? Even if he is declared innocent by the court, people will think, “Amir aadmi hoga saala, paise khila diya hoga.” Just think how his life going to change. People will despise him, women would run from half a mile of spotting him. He would have a stigma his entire life.

Since reading the story, my greatest fear is suppose if I refuse to pay for my girlfriend’s jewellery and she goes to police tomorrow and tells them I tried to rape her, what chance would I stand to prove my innocence? Who’s gonna believe “ABM’s such a gentle guy; he would never harm even a mosquito”? (OK I know few people will, but then few people even believe Mannu Sharma is innocent, point is, it doesn’t matter if people on my side are FEW). The Indian society is slowly changing into one where such people are loathed upon for eternity, the public voices their sentiments voraciously against them (which are positive changes) and even the courts are under pressure to give verdict against them (which is not). I can imagine thousands of people leading a march in India Gate and lighting millions of candles and shouting slogans like “Hang that bastard ABM”. I would have no option but to curse the day I refused her to pay for the fucking jewellery she bought, as the “jallad” is putting a black cloth over my head.

Few people (read women) would argue a woman would never do such a thing, put her “izzat” into stake. But even women are humans (perhaps) and can be greedy and jealous too. With the modernization of our society such old notions like no woman puts her modesty at stake are getting a backseat. Which means modern women are capable of such a thing, if they have to, perhaps for some worldly gain, in the same manner a corrupted official misuses his powers. So my fellow brothers, beware! I’ve done my duty as a responsible male. It’s your turn now to think about the matter.

Just an update

It is now sometime since I wrote my last post. Actually I had plans to post new stuff every 2-3 days. But since my life somewhat lost its direction early this month, everything's got delayed. Probably this will continue for about a month, hopefully by then things will get sorted out. Additionally, I've been working on getting a new website. As a child I used to get lots of ideas on writing stories, especially science fiction, but never actually wrote them down. I plan (something that I do too frequently) to write down stories from all bits of junk accumulated in my brain for a long time. Meanwhile, if I get positive feedbacks, I'll buy a domain (currently the website's hosted on googlepages) and then maybe all interested people with a good story can post their stories at one place. I guarantee it'll be fun, really. Currently the incomplete page is here.

So, as I get little insight into where my life is heading, I'll be back with more frequent posting, certainly more meaningful (or meaningless, it depends) posts. Till then take care fellas..

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One-liner of the day:
A woman knows she's wearing the right dress, when her man wants to take it off.

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Web page of the day is here. Though it was made for friendster.com, it somewhat applies to our dear Orkut as well!
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Rationale behind jokes. Sardar jokes.

For some time now (that would be about 5 minutes) I wanted to write on this. The reason why jokes are so popular. More specifically, why Sardar jokes are so popular. Ofcourse you might think that's because Sardars are furry creatures whose brains fire strange neurons which makes them act crazy when the clock approaches 12 o'clock and that's the reason there are so many jokes about them, but having known many Sardars, I can assure you that is not the case. They are pretty normal people. Some might act funny, but that's more to do with the fact that they are humans and not specifically because they are Sardars. So, then, why are jokes on them so popular? Why are these turbunated gentlemen (it sounds better than using "sardars" every time) made the butt of the joke so often?

To begin with, this has something to do with the way humans have evolved. Homo sapiens by default are social creatures. Their basic instinct is to remain close in groups with others who share some similarity with them or those with whom they can somehow relate to. The irony is that people unconsciously create some sort of mental barrier between themselves and all those who don't fit in their "group". This subconscious phenomenon got prominent as our society progressed and in the process became more diverse, resulting in the creation of more "sub-groups". Perhaps the most prominent amongst these was the formation of countries. We are humans, from the same ancestors (yes, even sardars too). We are genetically similar, look similar (I mean basic body structure at least). Yet we are somehow mentally cutoff from people of other countries. If we meet someone from our country in some foreign land, we automatically try to relate to them, that's human nature (*general* human nature). But that's not all. Within a country, especially one like ours, the society is further divided into zillions of sub-groups. We are geographically, linguistically and culturally segregated. We are divided on the basis of caste, creed, religion, sex (I know that sounds like a ripoff from high school civics book). The point is, just as somehow there is a mental barrier between people of different countries, there is a mental barrier between people of any different subgroups, however subtle the difference amongst them might be. And since people within a group perceive themselves as normal (because they have always been in that environment), actions and way of living of other groups seems strange, and is hence often made into a joke.

So, if we observe, Sardars in some respect are different, more precisely *look* different. They have beards and long hairs and wear turbans (I'm trying hard to avoid the word "judi"). So we have jokes on them. And not only them, any group which is somehow different have jokes on them, be it Madrasis, Bengalis or Biharis. There are tons of jokes on them too. The Madrasis have peculair accent, so there are jokes on them, the Bengalis also for similar reason. There are jokes on Biharis because, well, maybe because they are Biharis (it seems you don't need a reason sometimes). On a serious note, they also have somewhat different accent, are seen everywhere, and young Bihari boys hold hands and go for a walk during breaks (at Narayna Academy atleast).

So you see, that is the reason we have jokes on Sardars. Or Biharis or Bengalis or Madrasis. I've travelled to many parts of the country (owing to my dad's job) and have heard the same joke thousands of times, but the character changes every time. There was a famous joke on blondes. When a Bengali tells the joke, the blonde changes in to a Sardar. When a Punjabi, the same joke has a Bengali dick head instead of a Sardar. There are a million such jokes where the protaganist changes from a Sardar to a Bengali to a Bihari to a Madrasi, depending who the person is or where he belongs to. It appears the group which is immune to such things is the one which has no apparent marked difference in linguistics or appearance, like people of UP or MP (lucky bastards).

So, the next time you joke on a Sardar, remember someone might be joking on you!

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One-liner of the day:
Oh Lord, give me patience, and GIVE IT TO ME NOW!
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Plus there is this interesting homemade comic strip I liked:

http://img216.imageshack.us/img216/7277/image00001bu7.jpg
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First Post

Two years ago on a similar very ordinary night I read news how popular blogging had become. All people who blogged were cool (kewl?) dudes and dudettes and everyone else was a dud. They were counted amongst the “elite” of the society. Since I’m a very image conscious person, I too wanted to be amongst this “elite group”. So I got a blog. Overnight I transformed into a superdude. I also got a statscounter to keep track of the millions of people who would come to my blog.

Some two years later (which occurred recently) I read news how millions of blogs were created which were never used or updated and how blogger.com was going to get rid of them. Good, I thought. Damn these useless people who get a blog and never bother to write any stuff in them and waste precious server space. Until I remembered even I had a blog. A blog which had nothing but “Coming Soon” written on it for two long years. The blog which mentally made me a superdude two years back (I used to feel happy thinking that way). So I opened my blog and the first thing I did was to check how much population had visited my blog (Did I tell how vain am I?). Well something must have been wrong with the statcounter’s mathematics since it showed just 5 hits in two years. Only 5. Not millions. (I couldn’t believe it) Upon closer inspection it showed that even those 5 hits were from the same IP address. Mine. Duh.

So I thought (I think a lot) and realized to be a popular blogger one needs to have some posts in their blog. (I’m very intelligent, so be wary). So here it is. Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the first post of my blog. You all are blessed now and now have a reserved ticket straight to heaven in case you die reading my blog. (I’ve got a tie up with those people up there. If you die reading this blog, you are guranteed a place in heaven. Take my word for it). Those of you who survive, don’t worry; make sure you come back. You won’t survive the second time.

Keep visiting this place; I’ll try to keep it updated. Since it took me two years to get my first post, readers can expect an update every few years days.

PS:- With every post I’ll copy a one liner I liked from somewhere on the net. Even if you don’t like my posts you can come to read the one liner. They will be (usually) good.

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Shamelessly copied one-liner of the day:

How to impress woman: kiss her, hug her, compliment her, love her, tease her, protect her, listen to her, support her।
How to impress a man: Show up naked with beer. ************************************************